item #5022

Clara dearest girl, thanks, but I'm no deity. You're over-emotional. No bad thing; but the distortion which that state of affairs provides is not useful. In my view, this is often overstated in the general sense; but I feel, in your particular case, I must warn you of these problematic shortcomings. More reasonably, I am a flawed lady - just like you, and all others. But, again like you, I am trying to improve, like the Modernist I am at heart. Today, earlier, I was reading Wittgenstein, looking for nothing in particular, but therein I found the following: '...There is dominion and there is dominion-as-technique. The first suggests a lumpen mortality, with its chaotic ambit of emotions, foibles and weaknesses - all glorified, edified and personified by concerns for a fictive, illusory minority who manage the notion of completion as if it was dynamic, beautiful, and intriguing. The second is certainly alluring, even magical, in presenting morality as if it offered concepts commensurate with an occluded, secret amusement, or at least its related protectorate - the ignoble swarm, those archetypes without options...'. Yes, I know ... Greco-Roman, a little robotic. But even if the reverse is true, the same determinations apply, albeit simplistically modulated into lust for extremity on any terms. That's the detail. More importantly, you know I love you - and with an intensity which is both humane and animal. Let's retain that perspective - even whilst in the throes of passion. I dislike pillow-talk. But I'm not against some heartfelt truths unfurled in that context. Often, however, what you say there feels drastic and pointed; in positive ways, yes; but it smacks of control. There are shades of grey ... you know? These entail community and they invoke all the usual necessities - revealed as a continuum of sorts. Surely you want to continue? Precious, let's be good company. Let others be omnipotent; I'm not your CCTV. Please understand. Helena x