item #5000

ever since august 2006 theres been five occassions when ive been in a very big issue, each time then a panic attack. last panic attack was october 2007, when he asked me to remain for 24 hours before he begged for me instead of her. in a minute (or less) i was back following. i have told him i would not finish any thing until i am sure i can end things. well since i had those thoughts i am 9 years older. i have been released into someone else. hopefully no more unexpected terminations or events like that take place before the hand of death, heart attack or car accident. i care for my own self. (good influences). sexual time is better than a bottle full of pills. compromise makes happiness. (only my idea) jillian